a fine line...

In the last day or so, I have been comtemplating the fine, often gray, line between going with the flow/choosing your battles wisely/being true to yourself.

It's obviously very important to any relationship, whether romantic, or platonic, or even between teacher and student to be able to choose wisely. None of us is perfect, so how can we expect others to be... Life becomes a constant, miserable battle if you are nitpicking at everything.

It's undeniably important to be able to go with the flow, as life never goes exactly as we envision it,  no matter how carefully we plan!

But how do you know when you're giving up too much? How do you determine when it's ok to let go of your plans and when you should hold on fiercely? Einstein is quoted as saying that "insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results..." So how do you know when it's time to let go of the insanity and draw up a new plan, because that is what you were supposed to be doing all along?

Sun stand still

These last two weeks in church, the sermon series has been titled Sun Stand Still, in reference to Joshua 10:12, where Joshua asked the sun to stand still so he could defeat his enemies and God listened.During the sermons, we've been talking about asking God for the bing things, as well as the little things. Today's sermon was about Jesus raising Jairus' daughter from the dead... Nothing is too big for God. Now, our request may or may not be granted, but we should still ask for it and if it is in accordance with His will, he just may grant it. In fact, on the first Sunday of the series, a HUGE prayer from one of the congregation members was joyfully answered. A grandson who had been kidnapped 17 years ago, was returned home to the United States on that very day- talk about God's awesome timing!

Hearing these sermons really convicted me of just how little I trust God. Yes, I ask God for the big things in my life, but do I really believe that He will grant them to me? Sadly no... I know that I'm forgiven and that there is nothing I can do to earn His favor, but there is a part of me that clings to the nagging doubt. The doubt that says I'm not worthy of such big things. I know the Lord has done many miraculous things in my life, and yet I still don't know how to let go of my heart's deepest desire, to give it over to Him and to say "I trust you Lord to take care of this in what ever way you see best, in whatever way is going to bring you glory."

80-20

During the month of January, the sermon series at church was called Once Upon a Marriage. It looked at some of the Bible's most famous couples, and the things we can learn from their marriages. Being a single gal, I of course made lots of notes about things that I hope to someday be able to practice, but there were also some excellent applications that I can begin right away, such as trusting God and his timing instead of trying to take things into my own hands (Abram and Sarai).

The last sermon in the series focused on Hosea and Gomer. For those of who don't know the story, Hosea was a man of God, a prophet whom God called to marry Gomer, a prostitute. Even though God knew Gomer would be unfaithful to Hosea, God used this as a picture of Israel's unfaithfulness and God's continual faithfulness. Pastor talked about how in a good marriage, your spouse will be able to meet about 80% of your needs, and that people often become unfaithful when they start focusing on the 20% of their needs that aren't met by their spouse, believing (often falsely) that someone else can better meet their needs.

Whether it is to God, to a spouse or to something else, I think trading the 80 for the 20 often causes us to stray. How often do I focus on what God has not given me, instead of remembering and being thankful for all the things He does supply me? Too often I'm afraid. I become obsessed with the things that I don't have until I am completely ungrateful for the ways God has provided for me, even without me asking....

So tonight my prayer is from Psalm 51- create in me a clean heart oh God and renew a right spirit within me.... restore to me the joy of your salvation....

Here goes nothing...

A few days ago, I was reading my friend Katie's blog who had linked up with Kelly's corner to showcase her single brother. After reading some of the posts, I thought I would give it a try.

My name is Krystle and I will be 30 in May. I've never been married and I have no kids. I am a reading specialist at an elementary school in Houston. I'm passionate about teaching kids to read and more importantly to get them to love reading as much as I do. I've lived a lot of places, but most recently before Houston, I was living on the East Coast, in Allentown, PA. I'm a Lutheran who loves Jesus and is super involved at my church. I love to cook, especially bake and very few people have the will power to my tasty treats. I go out of my way to do things for others and I love helping people. I adore children and hope that in God's timing he blesses me with children of my own, but until then, I'm content being Auntie Krystle to all of my friends kids.
  If you're interested, you can comment on my blog with your email address.

Hope to hear from you soon!

 my 29th birthday

 One of the many kiddos who calls me Auntie Krystle!

 My girl Denise and I (I'm on the left)