For as long as I can remember, I've been an emotional eater. I have any emotion (good, bad, ugly) and I eat. For the most part, I try to eat pretty decently, but when I'm on an emotional downswing, I turn to carbs to try and pacify those emotions... the bread basket, pizza etc. While these things are temporarily satisfying, they ofen leave me feeling worse emotionally than I did before I ate them, so then I go back for more. I can eat an entire breadbasket at a restaurant before my meal arrives and then still eat my meal and most likely dessert too.
So for Lent this year, I decided to give up carbs, specifically- bread, pasta, pizza, potatoes and rice. This is my first foray into giving something up for Lent. Being a Lutheran, giving something up for Lent isn't mandatory, but it seemed like a good thing to do. I was super excited about the weight loss possibilities, as well as breaking my emotional dependence on food.
I'm 19 days in and I have to say that this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do!!!! I have been pretty fanatical, but I have to admit there have been a few slip-ups. Old habits die hard!!! This week has been especially difficult as it is spring break and I am home all day. Being at school has actually been good for me, because I'm often too busy to think about eating except at lunch time.
I haven't really noticed anything in the weight loss area, but as a good friend informed me, I needed to cut out fruit for the first two weeks also since it is high in natural sugars, so that my body gets used to burning the fat it has been storing... maybe that will be my next step.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Amazing Grace
This morning during church, we sang Amazing Grace. This is one of my favorite songs, so of course I sang with gusto and joy (despite my complete lack of ability to sing on key). I know most of the verses by heart, but today I was completely struck by the opening line of verse 4- "The Lord has promised good to me." With that simple line, I felt His peaceful presence come over me. On Thursday and Friday, I was feeling completely flawed. I know God has made me to be a unique individual, but I was feeling like me wasn't good enough, that the world in general didn't value me. With that simple and yet profound opener to verse 4, I was reminded that God does indeed love me very much, He does care for me and that He has made me unique for a reason, even I don't know that reason yet.
For those of you who aren't familiar with Amazing Grace, at least beyond the first verse, here are the words of the hymn in its entirety. Maybe it will provide you with some peace too...
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.
T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.
Through many dangers, toils and snares
I have already come;
'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far
and Grace will lead me home.
The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.
Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease,
I shall possess within the veil,
A life of joy and peace.
When we've been here ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we've first begun.
For those of you who aren't familiar with Amazing Grace, at least beyond the first verse, here are the words of the hymn in its entirety. Maybe it will provide you with some peace too...
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.
T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.
Through many dangers, toils and snares
I have already come;
'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far
and Grace will lead me home.
The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.
Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease,
I shall possess within the veil,
A life of joy and peace.
When we've been here ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we've first begun.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
a fine line...
In the last day or so, I have been comtemplating the fine, often gray, line between going with the flow/choosing your battles wisely/being true to yourself.
It's obviously very important to any relationship, whether romantic, or platonic, or even between teacher and student to be able to choose wisely. None of us is perfect, so how can we expect others to be... Life becomes a constant, miserable battle if you are nitpicking at everything.
It's undeniably important to be able to go with the flow, as life never goes exactly as we envision it, no matter how carefully we plan!
But how do you know when you're giving up too much? How do you determine when it's ok to let go of your plans and when you should hold on fiercely? Einstein is quoted as saying that "insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results..." So how do you know when it's time to let go of the insanity and draw up a new plan, because that is what you were supposed to be doing all along?
It's obviously very important to any relationship, whether romantic, or platonic, or even between teacher and student to be able to choose wisely. None of us is perfect, so how can we expect others to be... Life becomes a constant, miserable battle if you are nitpicking at everything.
It's undeniably important to be able to go with the flow, as life never goes exactly as we envision it, no matter how carefully we plan!
But how do you know when you're giving up too much? How do you determine when it's ok to let go of your plans and when you should hold on fiercely? Einstein is quoted as saying that "insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results..." So how do you know when it's time to let go of the insanity and draw up a new plan, because that is what you were supposed to be doing all along?
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Sun stand still
These last two weeks in church, the sermon series has been titled Sun Stand Still, in reference to Joshua 10:12, where Joshua asked the sun to stand still so he could defeat his enemies and God listened.During the sermons, we've been talking about asking God for the bing things, as well as the little things. Today's sermon was about Jesus raising Jairus' daughter from the dead... Nothing is too big for God. Now, our request may or may not be granted, but we should still ask for it and if it is in accordance with His will, he just may grant it. In fact, on the first Sunday of the series, a HUGE prayer from one of the congregation members was joyfully answered. A grandson who had been kidnapped 17 years ago, was returned home to the United States on that very day- talk about God's awesome timing!
Hearing these sermons really convicted me of just how little I trust God. Yes, I ask God for the big things in my life, but do I really believe that He will grant them to me? Sadly no... I know that I'm forgiven and that there is nothing I can do to earn His favor, but there is a part of me that clings to the nagging doubt. The doubt that says I'm not worthy of such big things. I know the Lord has done many miraculous things in my life, and yet I still don't know how to let go of my heart's deepest desire, to give it over to Him and to say "I trust you Lord to take care of this in what ever way you see best, in whatever way is going to bring you glory."
Hearing these sermons really convicted me of just how little I trust God. Yes, I ask God for the big things in my life, but do I really believe that He will grant them to me? Sadly no... I know that I'm forgiven and that there is nothing I can do to earn His favor, but there is a part of me that clings to the nagging doubt. The doubt that says I'm not worthy of such big things. I know the Lord has done many miraculous things in my life, and yet I still don't know how to let go of my heart's deepest desire, to give it over to Him and to say "I trust you Lord to take care of this in what ever way you see best, in whatever way is going to bring you glory."
Monday, February 6, 2012
80-20
During the month of January, the sermon series at church was called Once Upon a Marriage. It looked at some of the Bible's most famous couples, and the things we can learn from their marriages. Being a single gal, I of course made lots of notes about things that I hope to someday be able to practice, but there were also some excellent applications that I can begin right away, such as trusting God and his timing instead of trying to take things into my own hands (Abram and Sarai).
The last sermon in the series focused on Hosea and Gomer. For those of who don't know the story, Hosea was a man of God, a prophet whom God called to marry Gomer, a prostitute. Even though God knew Gomer would be unfaithful to Hosea, God used this as a picture of Israel's unfaithfulness and God's continual faithfulness. Pastor talked about how in a good marriage, your spouse will be able to meet about 80% of your needs, and that people often become unfaithful when they start focusing on the 20% of their needs that aren't met by their spouse, believing (often falsely) that someone else can better meet their needs.
Whether it is to God, to a spouse or to something else, I think trading the 80 for the 20 often causes us to stray. How often do I focus on what God has not given me, instead of remembering and being thankful for all the things He does supply me? Too often I'm afraid. I become obsessed with the things that I don't have until I am completely ungrateful for the ways God has provided for me, even without me asking....
So tonight my prayer is from Psalm 51- create in me a clean heart oh God and renew a right spirit within me.... restore to me the joy of your salvation....
The last sermon in the series focused on Hosea and Gomer. For those of who don't know the story, Hosea was a man of God, a prophet whom God called to marry Gomer, a prostitute. Even though God knew Gomer would be unfaithful to Hosea, God used this as a picture of Israel's unfaithfulness and God's continual faithfulness. Pastor talked about how in a good marriage, your spouse will be able to meet about 80% of your needs, and that people often become unfaithful when they start focusing on the 20% of their needs that aren't met by their spouse, believing (often falsely) that someone else can better meet their needs.
Whether it is to God, to a spouse or to something else, I think trading the 80 for the 20 often causes us to stray. How often do I focus on what God has not given me, instead of remembering and being thankful for all the things He does supply me? Too often I'm afraid. I become obsessed with the things that I don't have until I am completely ungrateful for the ways God has provided for me, even without me asking....
So tonight my prayer is from Psalm 51- create in me a clean heart oh God and renew a right spirit within me.... restore to me the joy of your salvation....
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Here goes nothing...
A few days ago, I was reading my friend Katie's blog who had linked up with Kelly's corner to showcase her single brother. After reading some of the posts, I thought I would give it a try.
My name is Krystle and I will be 30 in May. I've never been married and I have no kids. I am a reading specialist at an elementary school in Houston. I'm passionate about teaching kids to read and more importantly to get them to love reading as much as I do. I've lived a lot of places, but most recently before Houston, I was living on the East Coast, in Allentown, PA. I'm a Lutheran who loves Jesus and is super involved at my church. I love to cook, especially bake and very few people have the will power to my tasty treats. I go out of my way to do things for others and I love helping people. I adore children and hope that in God's timing he blesses me with children of my own, but until then, I'm content being Auntie Krystle to all of my friends kids.
If you're interested, you can comment on my blog with your email address.
Hope to hear from you soon!
My name is Krystle and I will be 30 in May. I've never been married and I have no kids. I am a reading specialist at an elementary school in Houston. I'm passionate about teaching kids to read and more importantly to get them to love reading as much as I do. I've lived a lot of places, but most recently before Houston, I was living on the East Coast, in Allentown, PA. I'm a Lutheran who loves Jesus and is super involved at my church. I love to cook, especially bake and very few people have the will power to my tasty treats. I go out of my way to do things for others and I love helping people. I adore children and hope that in God's timing he blesses me with children of my own, but until then, I'm content being Auntie Krystle to all of my friends kids.
If you're interested, you can comment on my blog with your email address.
Hope to hear from you soon!
my 29th birthday
One of the many kiddos who calls me Auntie Krystle!
My girl Denise and I (I'm on the left)
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Riley- one year old
So, a lot of my friends write posts updating us all on the fun milestones and general happenings of their children at various stages... since I don't have kids, I thought I would post about Riley. I don't know his exact birthday since I adopted him from a shelter (and I am choosing to celebrate Feb 21- the day we became a family instead) but the shelter thinks he was born on Dec 26, 2011...
Eating-
*eats two cups of Beneful Puppy food/day (one in morning and one at night)
*loves people food, especially peanut butter
*will whine if you don't let him lick the dishes
*eats anything you put in front of him
Sleeping-
*is a huge snuggle bug and likes to sleep with some or all of his body on top of mama
*hogs the bed
*mostly sleeps through the night
Playtime-
*loves visiting his friends at Doggie Day Care on some Wednesdays
*could play fetch for hours
*loves to chew on rawhide bones
*enjoys playing in the backyard, especially in the craters he has dug
*splashes in every puddle he can
Favorites-
*when Mama comes home from work- he even jumps up and kisses me
*meal time
*stealing Mama's socks
*chewing
*walks
*checking the mail with mama without being on a leash
Dislikes-
* being moved around on the bed so mommy can have a tiny bit more space
*putting on a leash (he's great once you get it on him, but he runs away at first)
*baths
Tricks-
*sit
*shake (only with a cookie in hand)
*fetch
*has selective hearing when mama calls him, but will always come running at the mention of a c-o-o-k-i-e
Eating-
*eats two cups of Beneful Puppy food/day (one in morning and one at night)
*loves people food, especially peanut butter
*will whine if you don't let him lick the dishes
*eats anything you put in front of him
Sleeping-
*is a huge snuggle bug and likes to sleep with some or all of his body on top of mama
*hogs the bed
*mostly sleeps through the night
Playtime-
*loves visiting his friends at Doggie Day Care on some Wednesdays
*could play fetch for hours
*loves to chew on rawhide bones
*enjoys playing in the backyard, especially in the craters he has dug
*splashes in every puddle he can
Favorites-
*when Mama comes home from work- he even jumps up and kisses me
*meal time
*stealing Mama's socks
*chewing
*walks
*checking the mail with mama without being on a leash
Dislikes-
* being moved around on the bed so mommy can have a tiny bit more space
*putting on a leash (he's great once you get it on him, but he runs away at first)
*baths
Tricks-
*sit
*shake (only with a cookie in hand)
*fetch
*has selective hearing when mama calls him, but will always come running at the mention of a c-o-o-k-i-e
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